Five Myths About "The Sex Talk": Talking with Your Teen About Sex

“The sex talk” from parents usually gets a pretty negative wrap in mainstream media and television.  Scenes of the awkward mom or dad trying to approach the topic with their savvy teen are always good for a few cheap laughs. But whether or not this depiction is the norm, it almost certainly is not the way to create a healthy and Biblically based dialogue about sex with your child or teen.  Here are a few stereotypes/myths about “the talk” we’d like to challenge, in an effort to help you raise a teen with a healthy and Christ-centered view on sexuality.

Myth 1: At some point in your child’s life, you will sit down and have a long, serious talk about sex. Then you will have done your duty and the job is over.

The idea that at a certain age, it is your job as a parent to sit down and have a long talk about “the birds and the bees” with your child is just plain silly. There is no way you can share everything your child needs to know to have a healthy view on sexuality in an hour, nor would it be beneficial do so once and check it off your list. Instead, establish an ongoing dialogue about sex, even if it seems awkward at first. Whether it’s animals mating on the Discovery Channel, a vulgar movie scene they saw at a friend’s house, or a pregnant teen in your community, take these chances to ask your child what they already know about sex, what their views are, and then share your own views. 

Myth 2: When talking about sex, use vague and general terms so as not to “corrupt” your child.

Have you seen the 2013 KIA Superbowl commercial? It’s cute, clever, and accomplishes its goal of promoting KIA cars, but it also depicts the common myth that parents should be vague or even lie to their kids about the details of sex. In the end, this will cause more confusion than good. Be explicit and use real anatomical terms. Obviously the level of detail should vary with your child’s age, but telling your child they should avoid “inappropriate behavior” isn’t going to help your teen when they are faced with a real sexual situation and have to make a decision.  

Myth 3: Talk about abstinence as the only available method of birth control, mentioning others will just give them ideas.

Chances are pretty good by the time your child reaches their teen years, they will have heard of condoms, the pill, and more, and may even have friends using them. This is a tricky topic to approach, and absolutely should not be presented as an acceptable alternative to abstinence.  However, having an informed and honest conversation with your teen about methods that others are using shows them:

1. That you are aware that this has become the cultural norm and you are asking them to be different
2. Allows you to dispel false assumptions they may have heard from others. For example: “John told you there’s no way he can get his girlfriend pregnant because he used a condom? Did you know according to the CDC condoms have an average failure rate of 18%?”

Myth 4:  Focus mostly on the negatives of having sex outside of marriage—you want your teen to associate sex with sin.

Many Christian parents make the mistake of hammering home the negative aspects of sex outside of marriage so hard that their children mistakenly associate all sex with sin. Don’t forget to remind them that God designed sex, but there are good reasons He designed it for marriage only. Have your teen read through Song of Songs and then ask you any questions they might have.

Myth 5: If your child is already well into their teen years, it’s too late to talk to them about sex, they’ve already heard it all!

Whether your child is 10 or 18 years old, it is never too late to begin a healthy dialogue about sex! Even if your teen has already made mistakes, remind them that our God is a God who loves grace, second chances, and fresh starts. 

Preparing to Communicate with a Troubled Teen

As your sweet, innocent child becomes a teenager, it is quite likely they will lose much of that sweetness and innocence, leaving you confused and frustrated. It's hard to know exactly how often and how much your child will rebel or struggle during their teen years, but developing a habit of healthy communication early on will help you as a parent be more prepared for whatever struggles you face with your teen. 

Never speak out of emotion.  Emotion is your enemy in communication.  Always pause before you respond, pray, and consider the right words with the right demeanor and tone.  How you respond can alter not only the direction of the conversation, but also a child’s future.  The bible gives this advice “¹⁹ My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry, ²⁰ because human anger does not produce the righteousness that God desires (James 1:19-20).”  If you find that you or your child are simply too emotional to rationally communicate, give yourselves some time and space to process.  Once the emotion of the moment has receded, try again.  If communication again becomes too emotional, consider bringing in a 3^rd party whom you both trust to mediate the conversation.  In some instances, it may be best to seek professional counseling to communicate.  Remember, whatever it takes, you must keep communication channels open.  Lack of communication, in any relationship, leads to a broken relationship.  Do what you must to communicate with your teen. 

As you communicate with your child, ask curious questions.  Don’t talk AT your teen; talk WITH them.  Let them know it’s okay to struggle in life – that it’s human.  Let them know that you have struggles as well.  Empower your teen by asking them what they think about a situation.  Ask them to think of possible solutions.  This helps them process, keeps you both engaged, and allows you a voice of guidance without demanding direction.  As teenagers grow, so does their desire for independence.  It is quite surprising how well teens are able to process and develop plans for improved behavior if given time and power to do so. 

Finally, remember that you are not responsible for your teen’s reaction.  Speak the truth to them, in love, but speak truth.  You do them a great disservice if you are afraid of hurting their feelings by speaking the truth.  Many have stated that sometimes “the truth hurts.”  This is a fact.  However, the opposite is also true and is much more damaging, “avoidance of pain only brings more pain.”  If you avoid telling your child the truth about their behavior; if you avoid disciplining your child; if you sugar-coat a potentially damaging circumstance or behavior, you will only inflict more pain on your child and your family.  

The following statement is also true, “avoidance of communication with your child will yield the pain of a distrust, isolation, and drive them to others whom they feel will listen and understand them.”  And often, those whom they seek out for communication, for acceptance, - those with whom they form relationships, are those who will negatively influence them.  Make time for you teen so you are who they go to for advice. 

By Scott Taylor, Caribbean Mountain Academy Director

How Much Do You Love Them?

The more I work with families, the more I am surprised by what I learn. I often hear moms or dads tell me how much they love their children, and that they would be willing to do anything to help them. Unfortunately, sometimes what I observe is completely the opposite of true sacrificial love.  I will give you some examples and let you be the judge.

•  A child is struggling with a pornography  addiction, but a parent refuses to have their child speak to their youth pastor because they are embarrassed that this has been going on in their home.

•  A teenage boy has no job, but always seems to have cash available to go to the movies and buy the latest electronic gadget. His parents never ask how or where he is getting his funds, because they are struggling financially and know they could never afford to give him the things he wants.

•  A child is questioning his/her faith because of what they are hearing from peers or teachers, but the parents don’t make time to go to church or youth group because their weekends are reserved for the lake.

• A young man is an incredible football player and is caught selling drugs for the second time. The parents fail to enforce the rules laid out the first time he was caught, because they are afraid it will cost him his scholarship.

Each of these examples comes from a real discussion I had with the parents of a child who is struggling. The common denominator in each of these situations is that the parents must choose between what is best for their child or what is convenient.

How much do you love your family?  Enough to do whatever is necessary?

By Mark Terrell, CEO

Parenting a Teen in the Age of Social Media

If you're the parent of a teen, the words "social media" might give you a pit in your stomach as your mind immediately jumps to all of the horrible stories you have read about the dangers of this exponentially growing industry that your kids understand so much more than you do. But social media, like any new technology, is not inherently bad. In fact, it is arguably an important skill for your child to learn as it will no doubt become relevant in their future lives. Social media has become an industry, not to mention a critical part of most business strategies, so consider that chances are good that being social media savvy could very well benefit your child's career.

But on the flip side, if not used responsibly, it could greatly damage their career, relationships, and even safety. So what can parents do to teach teens how to use a powerful tool they may not understand themselves? A few suggestions:


Be aware: Know exactly what social media sites your teen uses, and make it your business to at least learn the basics of those same sites. Create a profile on each of the sites and, even if you never post anything yourself, use it to keep tabs on what they are posting. Let your teen know you will be keeping tabs on what they post and require them to accept you as a friend or follower. This establishes that principle that they shouldn't be posting anything they would not want you seeing.

Determine specific age privileges: There are certain ages where teens simply don't yet have the maturity to be solely responsible for the power social media provides. Talk with your spouse and agree on levels of privileges for each age. For example, your child can create a social media account when they are 13 but must give you the login and password. When they turn 14, you will not log in anymore, but will still check their profile, etc. 

Reward responsibility: If your teen proves themselves to be responsible with a Facebook account for a set amount of time, allow them to also get a Twitter. Conversely, if they post inappropriate pictures, words, etc. on one social media account, let them know ahead of time that this will result in a waiting period before they can create more accounts. 

Understand the identity issues: Parents often don't understand how much a teen's identity can become wrapped up in the number of friends, followers, likes, and comments a teen has on a specific social media account. In their minds, popularity is now quantifiable and public, and can take an enormous toll on self-esteem if the numbers aren't high enough. Don't shrug it off if your teen gets upset about the low number of likes they got on a picture. Use it as an opportunity to talk with them about identity. Sympathize with their struggle, but also explain the lack of real value in these numbers that seem so important in the moment.

Tell them the horror stories: If you read a story about an old inappropriate picture costing a prospective employee job, or  a man being arrested for uploading a video where he pretending to drink and drive , casually mention it to your teen. It doesn't need to be a long lecture about the evils of social media, but letting your teen know about real consequences for things posted will stick with them. Then maybe they'll think twice before posting that status about drinking or drugs that to them was a joke, but could have very real consequences.

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Reacting to Your Teen & Therapeutic Crisis Intervention

If you are the parent of a teen, chances are pretty good that you will be gifted with the opportunity to confront disrespect or anger from your child. The natural response is to react with anger, frustration, yelling, or hurtful words. This is our tendency as human beings, and can feel like an effective defense mechanism.

But however "good" it may feel in the moment, reacting out of emotion will not only escalate the situation, but will also cause you to miss a crucial moment to teach your teen. When your teen is experiencing intense emotions, they may be physically unable to think clearly; this means that any lessons you attempt to teach them in the moment will be lost.  Your goal in an explosive situation of disrespect should be to de-escalate the emotion, giving you the opportunity to have a rational conversation with your teen. But that's easier said than done, right?

This is where a method called Therapeutic Crisis Intervention comes in. Therapeutic Crisis Intervention was developed by Cornell University, and focuses on de-escalating an explosive emotional situation. Many of our staff at Caribbean Mountain Academy have received formal training on Therapeutic Crisis Intervention. As a parent, try using the following first step of this method to control your own reaction. Before reacting, ask yourself these four questions:

1. What am I feeling?
2. What does my child feel, need, or want?
3. How is the environment affecting my child?
4. How do I best respond? 

Giving yourself even two minutes to consider these questions will allow you to respond in love, rather than in anger. After that, you can use an appropriate response from the Therapeutic Crisis Intervention method, such as gently helping them through a frustrating task, giving them space, or redirecting their attention to something else. 

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Five Tips for Talking with Your Teen

Does it ever seem like you and your teen are talking different languages or not talking at all? You may find these tips helpful in bridging the communication gap.

1. Chat with your child. If communicating has been lacking in your relationship, chatting with your child is a good way to start again.  Making small talk, without being critical, creates a non-threatening environment for kids to express themselves.

2. Remember that a teen’s behavior is sometimes their language.  However, it’s best to ask, rather than assume, what they are trying to say non-verbally.

3. Eating is a social activity that can create a positive environment and time to talk your child about their day.  Establish this habit early in your family.

4. Create opportunities for one-on-one time with each child and make it a special time alone with each parent.  Since each child-parent relationship is unique, it a great opportunity to grow relationships.

5. Be sure to engage in equal sharing time versus probing into your teen’s thoughts and feelings.  Sharing builds intimacy and trust.  

      What methods have worked for you in communicating with your teen? 

      By Ruth Skeel, Director of Clinical Services

Tips on Keeping Sibling Rivalries in Check

Any of us with siblings can recall at least one event of sibling rivalry gone awry. Nasty words are exchanged and perhaps even some pushing and shoving. Sibling rivalry is a normal part of growing up with a brother or sister. Many people believe it to be a rite of passage and a good way for children to learn conflict resolution skills. However, it is important for parents to monitor conflicts between your children and to look for signs of bullying.

There has been little research on the effects of sibling bullying; however, a new study published in the Journal of Pediatrics concluded that sibling aggression should not be dismissed. The psychological anguish from sibling bullying can be just as damaging as peer bullying. The study reported that children who experienced sibling aggression in the last year were more likely to report signs of depression, anxiety, and anger. In the study, aggression was defined as physical abuse, verbal abuse, intimidation, or having their things stolen or purposely destroyed. The study goes on to suggest that anti-bullying awareness campaigns should include sibling bullying as well.

As a parent, how can you distinguish between common inter-sibling spats and bullying? Ask yourself if the aggression is one-sided and chronic. If the aggression goes both ways and occurs sporadically then bulling may not be the issue. However, if one child consistently plays the role of aggressor and instigator then it is important to have a family talk about the issue.

Helping your children get along and develop a relationship is important to every parent. Try these tips to help keep sibling rivalries in check:

Clearly defined rules and consequences: Children and teenagers will continually test boundaries as part of normal development.  Make sure they know what behaviors cross the line and firmly follow through with implementing consequences when the line is crossed. 

Give them space: Allow your children time to be alone or away from their siblings. This is especially important if your children share the same bedroom. Find activities that they can do alone or enroll them in different extracurricular activities.

One-on-one attention: Make an effort to give all your children some one-on-one attention with you. This can help reduce feelings of jealously or favoritism that can lead to sibling bickering.

Counseling: You may consider getting professional help if your children have extreme difficulty getting along. Marriage and family therapist are trained in resolving and mediating family conflicts and relationships.

By Miguel Brown

Miguel Brown holds a Master’s in Marriage and Family Therapy from the University of Miami, is a registered marriage and family therapist intern in private practice, and owner of Miami Teen Counseling. He has been working with adolescents and their families for over ten years. Connect with him on Facebook and Twitter. 

What Do I Do If My Child Rejects God?

As a Christian parent, a child's rejection of Christ and everything you have taught them is one of the most painful things you can endure. It will likely come with feelings of anger, guilt, inadequacy, and fear. The pain of not knowing if they will ever come back to faith can easily cause despair, but thankfully our God is a God of hope and redemption. But in your role as a parent, He has given you an immense responsibility to continue to show His love and grace to your wayward child, just as He continually does with us in our sin. Here are a few ways you can continue to show your child love and acceptance, without agreeing with their decision:

• Do not ignore the issue: Acknowledge that something is wrong and never communicate that their decision is “ok," BUT be very clear that it can never change your love for them

•  Help them sort out their emotional doubts vs. their intellectual doubt: If their doubts about faith are intellectual, give them apologetics books to read and tell them you’ll read one that expresses their viewpoint. Then try to really understand what they believe and why. If their doubts are emotional, try to point out how emotions aren’t always correct and shower them with love and grace in the name of Christ. 

•  Don’t expect them to be Christ-like: Treat your child as an unbeliever and don’t continue to hold them to the same standard as you would a believer.

• Show them your sorrow more than your anger: After you've made it clear that you don't agree with their decision, don't keep arguing with them, but when the topic comes up express your sadness. 

• Keep up a relationship: No matter how hurt or angry you are, continue to pursue your child. Always let them come home. Email them weekly. Take them to lunch. Our Heavenly Father never stops pursuing us, even at our lowest points. 

• Admit mistakes: You should not blame yourself for their decision, but it is important that they know you are not claiming to be a perfect Christian. If there is hypocrisy in your own life, take responsibility for them and apologize for not always being a Christ-like example. Encourage them to look to Jesus, not imperfect Christians, for their perception of faith. 

• Never stop praying: With God, there is no such thing as hopeless. Pray specifically for patience and grace with your child. Pray that God will soften their heart. 

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

More Resources: The Case For Christ (Lee Strobel), God's Remedy for Rejection (Derek Prince), Engaging Today's Prodigal (Carol Barnier), What's Happening to My Teen: Uncovering Sources of Rebellion (Mark Gregston), Do Hard Things: A Teenage Rebellion Against Low Expectations (Alex and Brett Harris)

How Can I Be a Spiritual Leader to My Teen?

Who is the primary spiritual leader of your teen? Who do they look to as a role model? Youth pastors, mentors, and small group leaders are certainly important for a teen to look to for advice, but the Bible is very clear that spiritual leadership should fall primarily on the shoulders of the parent.

Easy, right? Not quite. The concept of "spiritual leadership" can feel like a hard one to grasp. How often should I pray with my family? What parts of the Bible should I encourage them to read? Should I require my kids to be involved in their youth group? What about mission trips? While these are good questions to consider and pray about, spiritual leadership can't be achieved through any standard formula. It's a lifestyle – a way of talking, thinking and behaving.  

Dave Long, our Vice President of Operations, said it this way, "Quite simply, leadership is modeling what you expect of others.  If you’re a father who values hard work, you’re willing to mow the yard, clean up after dinner, and maintain employment.  If you’re a mother who values communication, you’re willing to listen, engage in conversation, and share information in a mature manner. And if parents act to the contrary, expect contrary results from your children."

When it comes to teens, this is especially true. If you want to encourage your teen to commit time daily to devotions, make it a point to spend 20 minutes in the morning or evening, or whenever your teen is around, reading your Bible in the living room.  If you want them to stop watching inappropriate movies, don't let them see you watching something you shouldn't...even if it seems "harmless" for an adult.

We're all sinful people, so naturally leading by example is no easy task. But even if you don't see results right away, things your teen sees and hears you do consistently will strongly shape the way they view faith. It's a big responsibility, but definitely one worth working at.

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Helping Your Teen Find Joy in Service

Serving others can come in many different shapes and sizes – it could be building a house for someone in a third world country, helping out at your local homeless shelter, listening to a friend in need, or hosting a "messy kickball" game for local children in the Dominican Republic.

You might be thinking..."Huh?? How is playing a game of kickball and sliding around in the mud considered service?" Well, here's the thing....we have found that service isn't necessarily about what you're doing, but how and why you're doing it. At Caribbean Mountain Academy, we want to teach teens how to find true joy in serving others.  We want them to discover that making others happy brings much more fulfillment than making yourself happy. 

And as our students laughed and played with these Dominican kids, they began to learn these lessons...and also learned that service can be fun! 

But you don't have to be in the Dominican Republic to help your teen learn how to find joy in service. Physical, emotional, and spiritual needs are all around us, wherever we are. Is there a local food pantry your family could spend time volunteering at? Or what about hosting your own game day for neighborhood children? The opportunities are endless. 

We know that for some parents, getting your teen to cooperate with a family service project may seem like a nearly impossible task. But here's something you can try: use the service project as a way for a teen to "earn back" privileges they may have lost. At Caribbean Mountain Academy, we have found that re-enforcing positive behavior often is much more effective than punishing negative. So if your teen was grounded for staying out to late, or lost their phone for disobeying, give them the opportunity to earn it back by participating (with a GOOD attitude) in a pre-determined service project. 

Not only will you be teaching that positive behavior earns privileges and trust, but you will also have begun to show your teen how to find joy in service.

See more pictures of the "messy kickball" game on our Facebook page

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Parenting: Don't Give Up on Discipline

Children learn very early if a parent is serious about following through with discipline. If your five-year-old learns they can get you to give up on discipline by throwing a temper tantrum, there's a good chance that is probably not going to stop when they're 16. But we know discipline is hard, and sometimes it may seem easier just to give in. In a recent blog on discipline, Crosswinds CEO Mark Terrell described it by saying, "Parenting and disciplining is not for the faint-hearted, and must be done with the same vigor with which you approach your career. Early efforts will pay off in the future, but a lack of discipline will cost you in the end."

So how do you stay strong and discipline your child in a healthy, loving (but firm) way? Although there's no magic formula to being a perfect disciplinarian, here are a few methods that may help you along the way:

• Follow through on discipline, even when it hurts your fun.

• Both parents must be on the same page or the child will divide and conquer you.

• Never make a threat that you aren’t willing to follow through on.

• Don’t make every battle a world war.  Make it your goal to win the war, not just the battle.

• Expect first time obedience

• Never argue about a child’s discipline in front of the child.  Excuse yourself to a private place and come out united. 

• Be willing to admit when you make a mistake. If you lose your temper and say or do things that you shouldn't, apologize to your child and explain why what you did was wrong. 

Mistakes will happen. There is no such thing as a perfect parent, or a perfect child. But the most important thing is to never stop working to improve, and to show your child that you will never give up.

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Teaching Your Teen Daughter Modesty

We bet that almost ALL parents of teen daughters can relate to this topic. Fighting the modesty battle is getting harder and harder, as the world keeps telling your daughter to show off more and more. But the battle is definitely worth it. Here's 5 quick tips we posted on our website last week that we hope will help you keep up the fight.

1. Set specific family modesty standards. . If all your daughter knows is that you want her to “dress modestly,” it’s easy for lines to be blurred or for her to feel like it will be impossible for her to live up to your modesty standards, and she may subsequently give up. Spend some time talking with your spouse about modesty standards you both agree on and then communicate them clearly to your daughter.

2. Tell your daughter she is beautiful.  Although stressing inward beauty over outward should be the priority, complimenting your daughter on a specific physical characteristic such as her eyes, hair, or even a specific (modest) outfit can really boost her self-esteem and self-image during an insecure time.

3. Model modesty in your own wardrobe. This may seem like a “well duh” point, but it could be harder than it sounds. As an adult woman, it can be easier to bend the modesty rules for ourselves .  But if your 13-year-old sees you walking out the door for date night—even if it’s with your husband— in a dress that breaks the modesty rules you’ve set for her, you lose credibility and may have a harder time winning the next modesty battle with her.

4. Know and explain your motives for modesty. What will you say when your daughter asks you why modesty matters? There are many different answers you can give, but here’s a few to consider. First and foremost, God calls us to modesty and purity. 1 Timothy 2:9-10 says, “I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” Now obviously this isn’t God’s way of telling us that we need to stick to ponytails and silver jewelry, but it is pretty clear about the importance of modesty in our role as Christian women. Secondly, how a girl dresses will determine the kind of guys she attracts. Your daughter may think she wants ANY kind of attention, but does she really want it from the guy looking for as much as he can get, as fast as he can get it, from any girl at all? To those kind of guys, it doesn’t matter who a girl is, or even how beautiful she is, as long as he can use her for what he wants.

5. Pray for your daughter daily. If earthly parents want purity for their daughter, how much more does our Father in Heaven want it for ALL of his daughters? So give your daughter all the prayer cover you can—God’s in your corner when it comes to modesty!

Read the full article on crosswindsyouth.org

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Helping Teens Fight Peer Pressure

A few weeks ago Crosswinds CEO Mark Terrell  shared some helpful tips on our website about how to fight peer pressure with your child. During your child's teenage years, the people they surround themselves with are going to be some of the most powerful influences on their life, and it's important to be prepared for the fact that they may not always be the best influences!

If you feel that your teen is slipping into some bad relationships, or bad behaviors, take a look at the advice Mark gives on how to help steer them back on the right track.

Build or rebuild your relationship with your child:

o   Have a technology free vacation with your spouse and children
o   Start a hobby that you can do together:  painting, hiking, exercising, etc.
o   Eat dinner together
o   Never accept one word answers
o   Go on a family mission trip
o   Create new memories

Find a way to introduce new friends to the equation:

o   Go to church together
o   Introduce them to the youth pastor
o   Encourage them to participate in a new sport
o   Start a bible study together with them and their friends

Find a way to remove them physically from the influence:

o   Move to a new community
o   Enroll them in a new school
o   Have them attend a church camp

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Caribbean Mountain Academy Teaches Teens to Value Others

Last week, Crosswinds CEO Mark Terrell blogged about how to teach your children the "preciousness of others." He begins with a personal story about visiting a concentration camp in Germany, and explains how he realized that an entire society had lost sight of the ability to value other human beings. Although this is an extreme example, it shows how careful we must all be to never forget the immense value of each and every human life. Even if we're not purposely hurting others, it's easy to become so wrapped up in our own schedules and problems that we forget to serve and care for others around us.

Mark and his son Hunter visit with Maria, a 

local Dominican woman, during a missions trip 

to Caribbean Mountain Academy

Mark goes on in his blog to explain that this concept of valuing others played a major role in the program development of Caribbean Mountain Academy. Mark writes that when his own children had the opportunity "to spend time serving, rather than being served, in a third world country [...] each one of them returned back with a new appreciation of what they have and the opportunities they have before them."

At Caribbean Mountain Academy, this concept gets put into action as students serve those in the local Dominican community around them. Through projects such as building houses, planning a VBS for local children, or renovating an old basketball court, students slowly begin to change their perspective and the way they think of others. They begin appreciate the satisfaction that comes from serving others—rather than serving themselves—and also the value of each person, no matter what country or culture they are from.

Mark writes that  "We wanted [Caribbean Mountain Academy] to be a place where young people would have the opportunity to learn to appreciate what they have, but more importantly have an opportunity to learn to appreciate the preciousness of others." And by the grace of God, this is exactly what it has become!

But even if your teen is not struggling with serious issues, teaching them the "preciousness of others" is still an important lesson. Taking time to serve others as a family—whether it's in another country or down the street—will help your children learn to look outside of their own world and value the preciousness of each human life.

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

Crosswinds and Caribbean Mountain Academy: What's the Difference?

What is Crosswinds? 

Crosswinds is a non-profit organization that began in 2011. All of Crosswinds’ services have a common goal: restoring families struggling with tough issues, facilitating long-term healing and growth. Our specialty is working with families who are dealing with issues relating to a troubled or difficult teen. None of our services offer a “quick fix,” but rather address the root of the problems a teen or family is facing, and then work to develop a long-term solution. We recognize that no two families are alike and so we offer a variety of services that can be “mixed and matched” to meet each family’s specific needs. Our programming can be broken down into two general areas: residential teen counseling and in-home family counseling.

What is Caribbean Mountain Academy? 

The residential teen therapy part of our program is where Caribbean Mountain Academy comes in. Located in the beautiful Dominican Republic, Caribbean Mountain Academy provides a safe and loving environment for teens to work through the struggles they have been facing.   It is offered as an option to families if the issues that they are facing with their troubled teen are spiraling out of control and a temporary change of environment for the teen is needed. Our program at Caribbean Mountain Academy seeks to address the root of the teen’s problems, rather than just addressing the behavioral symptoms. To ensure this holistic change, we require that the family of each teen enrolled at Caribbean Mountain Academy undergo regular in-home therapy and coaching during their teen’s stay. Meanwhile, the teen at Caribbean Mountain Academy will take part in intensive counseling, service projects for the local community, excursions to waterfalls, beaches, and mountains, all while receiving 24-hour care from our loving staff.

Does Crosswinds do anything else? 

Yes! Although our specialty is working with families raising troubled teens, Crosswinds also provides In-Home Family Counseling for families struggling with any number of issues. With the majority of family issues, especially those involving a troubled teen, we have found that treatment and healing are most effective when the whole family is involved. Our In-Home Family Counseling program provides personalized therapy in the privacy of your own home. This allows our staff to get a clearer picture of your family dynamics, improving your results and facilitating our effectiveness.  During the program, rather than focusing on just a family member who is in crisis, we focus on the entire family—parents, siblings, grandparents, or others within their circle of care. Our approach allows the whole family to acquire ownership in the progress and achievement of their goals. To ensure that your family has resources available at any time of need, we also offer 24-hour crisis intervention to any family enrolled in our In-Home Family Counseling program. Keeping families together is a high priority at Crosswinds, so we often recommend In-Home Family Counseling as the first step to overcoming family struggles.

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy