Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Teaching Your Teen Daughter Modesty

We bet that almost ALL parents of teen daughters can relate to this topic. Fighting the modesty battle is getting harder and harder, as the world keeps telling your daughter to show off more and more. But the battle is definitely worth it. Here's 5 quick tips we posted on our website last week that we hope will help you keep up the fight.

1. Set specific family modesty standards. . If all your daughter knows is that you want her to “dress modestly,” it’s easy for lines to be blurred or for her to feel like it will be impossible for her to live up to your modesty standards, and she may subsequently give up. Spend some time talking with your spouse about modesty standards you both agree on and then communicate them clearly to your daughter.

2. Tell your daughter she is beautiful.  Although stressing inward beauty over outward should be the priority, complimenting your daughter on a specific physical characteristic such as her eyes, hair, or even a specific (modest) outfit can really boost her self-esteem and self-image during an insecure time.

3. Model modesty in your own wardrobe. This may seem like a “well duh” point, but it could be harder than it sounds. As an adult woman, it can be easier to bend the modesty rules for ourselves .  But if your 13-year-old sees you walking out the door for date night—even if it’s with your husband— in a dress that breaks the modesty rules you’ve set for her, you lose credibility and may have a harder time winning the next modesty battle with her.

4. Know and explain your motives for modesty. What will you say when your daughter asks you why modesty matters? There are many different answers you can give, but here’s a few to consider. First and foremost, God calls us to modesty and purity. 1 Timothy 2:9-10 says, “I also want women to dress modestly, with decency and propriety, not with braided hair or gold or pearls or expensive clothes, but with good deeds, appropriate for women who profess to worship God.” Now obviously this isn’t God’s way of telling us that we need to stick to ponytails and silver jewelry, but it is pretty clear about the importance of modesty in our role as Christian women. Secondly, how a girl dresses will determine the kind of guys she attracts. Your daughter may think she wants ANY kind of attention, but does she really want it from the guy looking for as much as he can get, as fast as he can get it, from any girl at all? To those kind of guys, it doesn’t matter who a girl is, or even how beautiful she is, as long as he can use her for what he wants.

5. Pray for your daughter daily. If earthly parents want purity for their daughter, how much more does our Father in Heaven want it for ALL of his daughters? So give your daughter all the prayer cover you can—God’s in your corner when it comes to modesty!

Read the full article on crosswindsyouth.org

By Crosswinds Caribbean Mountain Academy

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